I believe we're in a period of transition in our human development and dating. There's a shift taking place and both men and women are being affected by it and both have to get settled into it. I've concluded that no one is to blame because both are making decisions based on the affects of human history and from their life experiences in an attempt to do things that are in their own best interests. While at the same time being totally unaware of the part that they’re playing and the impact that they’re having on each other. I believe it's something that just has to run its course until the next phase or season comes in. Yes, there will be yet another. There always is.
Let me make it a little more easily conceivable by taking a look backwards. There was a time in the early stages of this countries development when women did not work. It was expected and it was not a marital requirement. Men made a decent living and for the most part cared for their families while the wife attended to the children and home. During the time of WWII most of the men were shipped off to war. Forcing 5 million women (between 1940-1945) to join the workforce. It could be said that women held this country together by not just joining the workforce. But also maintaining housework, cooking and cleaning. When men came back home from the war they didn't come hack to the same types of women that they had left. Women were a bit more self sufficient, self reliant and much more capable. Not to mention a little more self confident! Meaning there was a shift in the financial hierarchy and family structure. This applies not only to family and married life but dating as well. Women were now moving into a new freedom. One were they were no longer dependant or trapped in a relationship or marriage where they were abused. Remember it was during this time that a man could for the most part batter his wife and it was consider "a marital issue" or "he’s disciplining his wife!" I recall Ralp Kramden of the Honeymooners every episode threatening to "knock Alice (his wife) to the moon!" Or James Evans from Good Times telling his wife Florida that he would “button her lip!” These were normal and accepted behaviors of that time but still oppressive and abusive towards women. And for the most part they lived with it. Of course the men of that time felt this shift. Of course they had to feel that they were losing control (a control that they never should have had in the first place). Of course they felt that they were actually a little less needed. This was a huge leap forward for both men and women but it still required an adjustment. For women to learn how to have this freedom and operate with it. For men to accept them in this new role as it unfolds. And it’s still unfolding.
I believe we're still adjusting to the economic independence of women today. But women are adjusting too. Some just don't know how to handle this shift in equality and financial independence. While at the same time recognizing and understanding the part that they can play according to the biblical role required of a wife without them feeling like they’re being shoved back into an era where they were considered to be not much more than children. Likewise men are adjusting to women "not needing them!" At least not the way that they think a woman should need them.
The world is ever changing. We are ever changing. The dating process does not get a pass. It too is ever changing. We have to continue to interested enough in each other to always be students of each other’s growth. Instead of complaining about our gender specific advancements and how it is taking something from us.
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